A 1st Birthday Party

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September turned 1 on the 23rd. She’s beautiful and so big now. Things about her are so not baby-like anymore. She’s definitely a toddler. But beyond that, she’s becoming this little kid, this little person filled with her own wants and she’s making them known. It’s challenging and I’m trying very hard to keep up with her pace.

first birthday

Still, her birthday party was fun and lots of people came to celebrate. We ate tons of food and watched her delicately pick at a giant cupcake. But while all of the festivities were going on, I couldn’t help but think how different our lives are now than they were a year before. Yes, a year ago today my husband and I had a week old baby and we were completely overwhelmed. I’d cry at the drop of a hat and felt like I just couldn’t do this. How on earth are you supposed to take care of another human being? How could I ever live up to this challenge?

It was rough.

At the party, my eyes wandered over those in attendance. So many people came to celebrate with us. So many people that weren’t in our lives this time last year. We were convinced we had to do everything alone. We didn’t ask for help. It was just Matt and I at home, struggling. But then, as the baby blues wore away, I found strength. And I asked for help. And you know what? People helped! People helped all the time and were more than willing to do so. When you’re depressed, it’s hard to comprehend how people can care about you. When you don’t care about yourself, it’s hard to see how you’re worth a damn.

More people are in our lives now than ever before. We are enriched by new friendships. We are strengthened by the commonality, the middle ground, that parenthood brings to those from all walks of life.

We sang happy birthday and opened presents and donned party hats in celebration of a little girl’s birthday. But inside I was rejoicing in the knowledge that we were walking with clear minds and open hearts for the first time in much too long.

Schedule? What’s That?

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I work from home. I’ve done this for the entirety of my adult life, pretty much. I write, mostly. This means I need time to concentrate. Anyone with a baby knows, this is next to impossible. At least while your little one is around or awake. So, I need time away from my precious girl to get work done. You know, to pay bills and stuff. And to keep my clients happy. But that’s easier said than done.


At the moment, I have a babysitter twice a week. So, for four hours on Wednesday and Thursday, I dash off to Starbucks and get my write on. I type so fast, my finger joints stiffen the moment they get near my laptop. “Noo! Be kind to us!” They scream. Alas, I am ruthless and put them to work despite their protests.

My in-laws take my girl sometimes, too. That gives me more time to work. But the rest of the time? I squeeze in a full-time work load during her naps and after she’s gone to bed. It’s not easy. It’s definitely not fun. And sometimes it makes me resentful. I don’t like that emotion.

And yet when I’m away from her, I can’t wait to be back with her. It’s crazy-making being in my head.

Motherhood has been one great big lesson in flexibility. And I’m SO inflexible.

While keeping her on a schedule is vital, my schedule changes from day to day. Lately, when I don’t have a babysitter, it looks like this:

  • 7:15 – Wake up
  • 7:30: Get ready for the day/make breakfast.
  • 8: Eat breakfast with September
  • 8:30-9:30 Clean up, playtime
  • 9:30: Put her down for a nap
  • Work like crazy!
  • 11: She wakes up/Play time
  • 12: Lunch
  • 12:30: Play time!
  • 3: Put her down for another nap
  • Work like crazy!
  • 4:30: She wakes up
  • 5:30: Dinner
  • 6: Play time/snack/bathtime/more play
  • 8: Read a book then put her down for bed
  • 8:30: Work like crazy! Take a shower. Sit. Stare. I can’t stay on the computer right up until I go to bed because it’ll keep me awake and I have trouble with insomnia so my workday HAS to end an hour before I go to sleep.
  • 11: Sleep. Sweet beautiful sleep.

It’s a full day. I get a lot done but never enough. I try to enjoy every moment and get caught up in what I need to get done once she’s asleep instead of just enjoying her. I hate that.

Whether you work from home like me, work outside the home, or stay at home (which is work enough!) what does your schedule look like? 

Work. Life. Mom.

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It’s all about finding balance.

Not just on this brand new blog. But in life in general. Scheduling out a few minutes a day to get things done I want to do, not just those I have to do is easier said than done. Often, it doesn’t happen. I’m okay with that most of the time. Other days it hits me hard. I miss life when it was less complicated.

work life mom

My daughter and I

Then I look at my sweet daughter’s face and know I’d never want to go back to that old version of myself ever again.

Motherhood. It’s filled with all the feels. And complicated ones, at that.

I’m also self-employed and run a writing and editing business. I have a babysitter sometimes. My in-laws watch my girl sometimes. But it all doesn’t add up to enough hours at the computer, putting fingers to keyboard, and making that money.

We’re struggling.

But we’re getting up every day and making things happen and I guess that’s something.

And that’s what inspired me to make this new blog community. About work. About life. About being a mom. And most of all, about bringing it all together to make for a not-so harmonious existence.

We make do.

What does this all mean for you, dear reader?

I’ll be sharing things that have helped me sort out this impossible balance. Tools, tips, and tricks. Rants. The occasional recipe or craft project. Plenty of photos of my family of course (with maybe a cat or two). And above all else, I hope to foster a place where other working moms can hang and talk about what concerns them.

Let’s prevent each other from going crazy!